


just a flicker of something

by youaremysundown



Category: Bodyguard (TV 2018)
Genre: AU: Julia is alive, Angst, F/M, I can't tag for shit, Not really though, SHE LIVES, cause fuck you Jed, idek, it's kinda cute, kinda hot, she just wants to be loved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-13
Packaged: 2019-08-01 10:18:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16282769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youaremysundown/pseuds/youaremysundown
Summary: Julia and David have been together for a few months now but she feels like he's not as invested as she is. It's basically Julia being a bit jealous/paranoid which results in anger and then make-up sex.Characters might be OOC but since they killed her early on who can say what she was really going to be like...I'm still bitter about it.





	just a flicker of something

**Author's Note:**

> Title is taken from a line of the song 'Let Go' by Dean Lewis.
> 
> I'm shit at summaries.
> 
> Please be gentle, this is my first time publishing anything anywhere and I am v. nervous. Feedback is welcome of course, but this was just a little self-indulgence that I thought I would share. I might add a second part to it if I ever get round to writing it.

She was sat at the kitchen counter, a glass of red wine in hand smiling to herself as David cooked dinner for the third night in a row. As it turned out he was quite domestic and she rather enjoyed having someone look after her. The last few months had gone by so fast. Almost immediately after the bomb that nearly claimed her life, David had pretty much moved in. Their relationship had become public knowledge and she was at the centre of a political scandal. She took it all in her stride and David had never once even seemed fazed by it, no matter how much the press hounded them. He had introduced her to his kids a few weeks later and she was already enamoured with them. They had spent days at the zoo and afternoons in the park, it almost made Julia regret not having her own children when she was younger, but she knew that her profession and lifestyle would never have been conducive in raising a family.

It made relationships all the more difficult too. Her last serious relationship was with her ex-husband, Roger, and that had ended in an unmitigated disaster. David was different though, kind, gentle and understanding of the nature of her job. But it didn’t stop her worrying. Worrying that this was all a whirlwind romance, doomed to end in ashes. She wanted him to be happy with her, wanted to have the kind of relationship that her parents had. The kind you saw in movies. But there was always that part of her that doubted whether David actually knew what he was in for. If he would want to be here in three months time when he finally realised that their lives were just not compatible. She was falling in love with him, but she wasn’t certain that feeling was mutual. He never gave much away. Julia sighed as she twirled a finger around the rim of her glass.

“What’s wrong love?” David asked, his focus shifting from the stir fry in front of him to the woman behind him. 

“Hmm? Nothing… just thinking,” she replied, a half-smile tugging at her lips. 

He chuckled a little in response, “That’s all you ever do, what’s on your mind?”

“I just..” she started, looking him in the eyes before dropping her gaze to her glass, “We have moved so fast and I just need to know that this is real. We don’t really know each other and there’s so much…”

“So much what? Things that could go wrong? Love, we survived you nearly getting blown up, I feel like we can make it through anything,” he interjected, turning back to the stir-fry on the stove.

“Well yes, but is this real? I don’t want to wake up in a few months time to find you’ve moved out and gone back to your wife and kids.” Julia tried to hide the rising panic and irritation in her voice. He had dodged this question once before, the first time she had spent time with his kids. They had come back from the cinema and had dropped them off at his wife’s house. Julia stayed in the car, not wanting to intrude, and had noticed the way Vicky’s hand had lingered on David’s as he handed over the kids’ backpacks. The way she’d smiled at him as he’d said goodnight. Julia was certain there were still feelings there. She remained silent until they arrived home when she asked him if he loved his wife. The answer had been neither a confirmation or denial, just typically vague. It didn’t do much to put her mind at ease.

“Julia not this again…” David sighed placing the spatula he was holding down on the counter as he hunched over the stove.

She stared at the back of his head, her eyebrows raised, waiting for the confirmation she hoped he would give. She watched him, waiting for any sign that might tell her what he was thinking, any movement that might give away his answer

“I will always have feelings for Vicky,” He turned to face her, looking into her eyes, sensing that this was not the answer she truly wanted to hear but unable to lie to her, “ she was the first woman I ever loved and she’s the mother of my children, there is always going to be feelings there…”

Before he could finish she cut him off, “So what, I’m your bed warmer?!” Her voice getting louder as her anger became more apparent in her eyes. She had stopped tracing her finger around the rim of her glass and was now stood at the island counter with her arms folded across her chest. Her typical angry politician stance. 

“Oh, Julia stop this!” His voice rising as he began to lose his temper. She was waiting for him to launch into an angry tirade, throw something, but this wasn’t Roger, David wasn’t like that.

She bit her lip and looked down at her glass, refusing to meet his gaze. “Fuck this,” David murmured as he stormed past her out of the kitchen and thundered down the hallway to retrieve his coat before heading out the front door and slamming it shut behind him.

Julia let out a heavy breath as she felt the walls of her flat tremble with the exit of her lover. Why did she always do this? She knew he cared for her and that he would never hurt her deliberately and yet she still felt like something wasn’t right. She picked up her wine glass to take a sip and out of nowhere, rage slapped her across the face and she launched her wine glass into the wall by the kitchen door as tears threatened to spill. 

Why could he not just tell her how he felt? She was sick of not knowing if she was enough, tired of not being able to feel like she truly mattered to him. After the bomb, she had noticed her emotions had become prominent in deciding her actions, a trait she used to deem as below her. She was headstrong, didn’t believe in the heart taking over. But now she let her tears fell onto the counter as her vision blurred. She sat there for, what felt like hours but in reality was probably only ten minutes, letting her emotions overwhelm her as she sobbed until her eyes were dry and red. She let out a shaky breath as she lifted herself off the stool and moved to clean up the broken glass by the door. She had just finished disposing of the now-defunct glass and the spilt wine when she heard the latch on the front door.

“Julia?” David called, not entirely sure if he would get an answer. She didn’t respond but instead moved into view, leaning against the door frame.

“Look love, I’m sorry…” he began, scratching his head, “I just…” 

“I know, I’m sorry too,” she replied half smiling, a single tear making its way down her face.

He approached her and pulled her close into him. She nuzzled her head into his shoulder as he stroked her hair. A few silent tears spilled from her eyes and soaked into his T-shirt. He knew he should be able to handle this better but he didn’t quite know the words to say. He pulled back and looked into her eyes as he wiped away a falling tear with his thumb. She smiled up at him and let out a shaky breath. His face remained unreadable, his years of training coming into effect once again. 

“I know I’ve been a mess and I’m sorry but I can’t do this without you,” Julia explained, her voice breaking. The earnestness and vulnerability in her eyes serving as a true reflection as to how fragile she had become since the incident. David smiled at her shyly and kissed her on the forehead.

“It’s alright love, let’s finish making dinner,” he said as he slung his arm around her shoulder to lead her back into the kitchen as her arm went around his waist, stroking little circles into his side. The high pitched beeping of the smoke alarm notified them both that maybe the stir fry was not such a good idea. David broke free from Julia and ran to turn off the stove as she giggled at the ridiculousness of their situation. He turned around at the sound of her laughter and smiled. It might be his favourite sound in the world. 

“Ow!” She cried out, the laughter replaced with a sharp wince and a few expletives. David ran over to her, confusion on his face. 

“What the fuck happened? Julia are you alright?” 

“I’m fine, I think it’s just glass in my foot.” 

He looked at her in bemusement, picked her up and set her down on the kitchen counter. There was a trickle of blood running down the underside of her foot as well as a shard of glass sticking out of her heel. 

“How did this even get here?” He asked bewildered and began to laugh as she explained that she got mad and threw a wine glass after him. She was never the type to throw things out of rage, she was a debater and would argue until the other person exhausted themselves. He carefully removed the glass and wiped away the blood with some kitchen roll before placing a plaster on and kissing the wound.

“There, all better,” he grinned and she looked at him with adoration.

“This is why I love you, you take care of me,” she said smiling slightly. He stared at her for a second before chuckling under his breath. Her questioning gaze prompted his reply.

“That’s the first time you’ve ever said that,” he moved upwards so their eyes were level and he could feel her breath on his face. Her breath hitched as she felt one of his hands tug her hips closer to him and the other cup her face, “but I love you too.” He grinned as her eyes went wide and a smile spread across her face. He gripped her chin and pulled her face to his as his lips gently captured hers. She smiled as he kissed her and threw her arms around his neck when he eventually broke for air. 

“I love you Julia, I’ll always have a place for Vicky in my heart, but I want you. I want you in my life, in my kids' life and I can’t see that changing anytime soon. I want you beside me.”

Julia smiled and a tear fell down her face again, he’d managed to say everything she needed to hear and she felt a weight lift from her as she pulled him in again for a bruising kiss. His hand gripped her thigh as hers travelled down his chest slowly. He breathed heavily and tried to suppress a moan as she reached his crotch. She smirked at the sound and was about to respond with a witty retort but was silenced by a gasp as David brushed his hand up her nightie and started stroking between her legs. Two could play at that game, and he was determined to win.

“Where do you want me Julia?” He asked, knowing that she would only barely be able to register the question. Her head tilted back, exposing her long neck, giving David the perfect opportunity to plant open-mouthed kisses down the expanse of skin.

“Oh God...here, beside me, inside me…” she breathed as his fingers slipped inside her, she was already so wet. He began pumping his fingers in a steady rhythm that was on the line of not enough friction and just enough to keep her on the edge.

“Right there!” she groaned as he delved deeper, hitting that magic spot. She bucked her hips to meet his movements and he had to hold her hips with his free hand to stop her sliding off the counter. 

“Do you want me in the bedroom ma’am, or do you want to be fucked here?” He smirked as she moaned at the use of the title that he knew turned her on. Her panting was driving him wild, he needed to have her soon, but he was determined to show her how good he could make her feel. To make her his. 

“Yes, both, just don’t stop,” her voice breathless as she gripped his shoulders to gain more traction against his fingers deep inside her. He noticed the little crease between her eyebrows as they pulled tighter together at the bridge of her nose in concentration, a reflection of the tightening inside her body as she came close to her climax.

He withdrew his finger, going against her command, and she whimpered at the loss of friction. “Bastard,” she muttered under her breath before he pulled her gently to the edge of the counter and pulled her nightie up over her head, exposing her naked body to him. 

“I love you Julia,” he whispered as he began to place kisses on her thigh, working his way upwards to where she needed him most, “Let me show you how much.”


End file.
